What's in a family

A quick thought from a very good friend of mine who spends his time helping addicts.

Any addict, no matter the person or the addiction, has a difficult road to recovery.  You'll see them be strong for a few weeks, or even 6 months or a year.  Then, without warning, they stumble.  The very next time they come into my office they are absolutely beside themselves.  They seem to hyper focus on the one time they stumbled.  I'll try to get them to see that in fact they have achieved a monumental success.  Being strong for so long.  Many of them believe that their battle with their addiction must now begin anew, from square one.  It's really fascinating, and heartbreaking, that their minds gravitate toward their one failure rather than their weeks or months of success. 

There's a couple different reasons for this unfortunate phenomenon. 

1.  We're hardwired to see our world in black and white.  We're either good, or bad, happy or sad, up or down.  If we stumble, even once, we'll flip the switch and go from "I'm ok" to "I failed." 

2.  We feel like we have to be perfect.  This feeling is amplified in our personal struggles.  We can't mess up.  Ever.

How many ways is this not about addicts, but about all of us?  We all intensely focus on our flaws and failures.  How do we make sense of a world in which we're wired to strive for perfection, yet know we'll never get there?  

The short answer is hagioi. 

hag-eee-OI

A little word with some profound meanings. 

Hagioi is the greek word in the New Testament translated as "saints", "the lords people", "holy" or even just "set apart." The word is used in both Corinthians, Philippians, Ephesians, Galatians, Colossians.  For Paul, the "hagioi" seem to be all the Christians, everywhere. 

It's Paul's favorite word to use when he's describing a group of believers.  In fact, several ancient historians call the Christian movement in the first century the "hagioi."

It's interesting that Paul uses this word.  He could, if he wanted, use words like "sinners" or "those who fall short" allow the language to really make the theme about God's grace. 

But for Paul, something happens when you become a Christian, you're now "hagioi" and it makes you part of the body.  

In Ephesians 4 Paul talks about this body, and in some translations it says "he (God) makes the parts of the body work perfectly."

There's a reason we're wired to want perfection, not because it's impossible, but because it's found in the body, the "hagioi" and God wants us to be part of it. 

My friend would say something like this. 

Perfection for my addicted friends is possible, but it can't be found alone.  It's in the body.  We're perfect in the body, and that's the best and only real way for them to battle their addiction.

Imagine you had to build a car, and you take all the worst parts from every car ever.  Old parts, rusty and failing, and when you put them all together suddenly it's the most amazing car in the world.  

Many imperfect things making one perfectly perfect thing. 

A bunch of imperfect addicted people coming together and becoming the perfect bride for Christ. 

It stops being "The addict vs. the addiction" and it becomes "The Church, (hagioi) vs. the person's addiction."

It stops being "me vs my selfishness" and becomes "the hagioi vs my selfishness"

My friend says,

Now that's an addiction that can be matched, beaten, and defeated on every level.  Defeated once and for all, perfectly defeated.